Choosing Books for Babies and Toddlers

Books are the doorway into so many wonderful shared experiences between you and your little one.  Finding the right books at each age can be easy when using this simple guide.

For Babies 0-6 Months
Simple pictures with bright colors are best for babies since their eyesight is still developing. Rhymes are soothing and your baby will love the musical sound of your voice.

For Babies 6-12 Months
At this age, your baby will want to touch and taste every book you share, so sturdy books with rounded corners or vinyl books are just right. Washable cloth books are cuddly for babies too.Books that inspire activity are loads of fun. Your little one will be delighted to  touch something fury, peak behind the flap or be surprised by a pop-up.

For Young Toddlers 12-24 Months
Sturdy picture books hold up best to the many ways that toddlers like to play with books.
From animal books and to books of children doing familiar things, toddlers love to see pictures that remind them of their own life.
Reading bedtime books together at bedtime is soothing and helps your little one to learn to slow down. Books that have only a few words on each page are just the right pace for this age.

For Older Toddlers 24-36 Months
What older toddler doesn’t love a story! Choose books that tell simple stories.
Read simple rhymes together and your little one will want to learn the rhyme.
Read books that teach counting, the alphabet, shapes or sizes.
Laugh together while reading books with humorous pictures and words.

MaryAnne Miller Allan, CCC-SLP –Looking Upwards’ Early Intervention Speech and Language Pathologist. Looking Upwards’ Early Intervention: Laying a Foundation for a Lifetime of Growth

The Beach – a great place to support your toddler’s language development!

Squeezing in those last days at the beach as the summer winds down? While you’re having fun is a fine time to support your toddler’s language development. Here are some ideas to encourage your little one to talk while enjoying the sun and sand!

•  Go for a stroll and bring your sand bucket. Pick up shells or stones or anything that catches your eye to collect in the bucket.  Talk about what you’re gathering.  While you’re at it, you can point out the waves and seagulls and enjoy talking about all of the sights along the shore.
• Building sand castles is not only full of sensory fun, it’s a great opportunity to teach concepts that have to do with location, such as in, behind, under, on top, off, etc… “Put your shell on top of the castle.”  “Put a rock in the hole”. 
• The beach is also a perfect place for teaching action words. Describe what you are doing while playing in the sand and swimming in the water (e.g. splash, dig, pat, run, swim, kick, etc…)
• Singing songs!!  “Row Row Row Your Boat”, “Slippery Fish”, “The Crabs on the Beach go Pinch Pinch Pinch”(sung to the Wheels on the Bus melody).  If your toddler doesn’t know all of the words to the song, make it a game by pausing then helping her fill in the last word of each line. Toddlers love to sing along. 

      It’s summer, so most of all…have fun!!!!

Sadie Peters, M.A., CCC-SLP — Looking Upwards’ Early Intervention Speech and Language Pathologist. Looking Upwards’ Early Intervention: Laying a Foundation for a Lifetime of Growth 

Tips to Help Parents Survive Sibling Rivalry

Summer is almost here. It’s a great time to talk about sibling rivalry. 

Siblings are often each other’s first teachers and adversaries. Like any relationship, sibling relationships have their ups and downs! At best, siblings can teach each other how to share, take turns, win and lose gracefully. Sometimes siblings learn how to negotiate, self advocate, argue their point of view, and apologize. These are worthwhile lessons! Yet sometimes, siblings just can’t get along. As parents, we are charged with the task of knowing when to step in and coach our children to work through their rivalries.

During the summer, our children may be spending additional time together. Often this time is unstructured or may be supervised by baby sitters or other caregivers while parents are working. Sibling rivalry is one of the realities of summer. Here are some tips to help you and your child’s caregivers navigate through these potentially challenging waters.

Your children are going to argue. As much as you can, model good self regulation and appropriate conflict resolution skills. When caregivers demonstrate how to deal with disappointment, frustration, anger, sadness, and other emotions, it is the most powerful way to teach children.

Your children are going to fight. A parent’s job is to ensure that children are safe and secure. Always intervene immediately and confidently when siblings physically hurt each other. Although young children sometimes resort to violence, it is never acceptable. Coach them through conflict resolution so that they learn to manage their anger differently. Keep in mind this phase will pass. Once children have good communication and conflict resolution skills, they will be better able to work things out without adult intervention, which happens bit by bit as they grow older.

Your children are going to want you to take sides.  Don’t. Even when you think one child may be in the wrong, try to avoid taking sides at all costs. Instead, try describing the undesirable behavior and ask your child to think of other ways to solve their problem. If one child accuses the other of something, resist the temptation of defending the other child. Instead, acknowledge their feeling by saying something like “you sound very upset”.

Your children are going to accuse you of not being fair. Remember that it’s not about equality but rather individuality. Your children may argue about things not being “fair” because they want things to be equal. But it is better to focus on each child’s individual needs instead of making sure each gets the same amount of everything.

Your children want to identify themselves. Try not to lock children into roles. For example, older children should not be expected to always be caregivers or responsible for younger siblings. Give them the opportunity to redefine themselves. Each time we characterize one child as being the “the sweet one”, “the funny one”, “the smart one” we imply that the others are not. Children accept these labels as truth and may be limited by them. Spend one-on-one time with each child. This time helps each child feel a special connection and helps rejuvenate your individual relationship. Your bond to each of your children is the basis for their sense of security.

Vilma Teves  – Looking Upwards’ Behavioral Consultant — Looking Upwards’ Early Intervention: Laying a Foundation for a Lifetime of Growth 

PARENT ALERT: Posting Your Child’s Photos using a Smartphone can Reveal Your Location

We love to share those precious photos we take of our children and grandchildren.  Yet, until recently, even experts weren’t aware of some of the frightening privacy risks that people are exposing themselves and their families to when posting photos with a smartphone. An NBC Action News story recently revealed how easy it is for people you don’t know to track your location, and eventually map out your child’s routes to school and favorite places. 

There is a smart way to use your smartphone to avoid this.  Before you post your next picture, we urge you to take a moment to learn how to de-activate your phone’s GPS system for photos posted online. Here’s a link to a video to show you how:  NBC Action News: Smart Phone Photos Pose Privacy Risk.

Valory McHugh, M.A., Director –  Looking Upwards’ Early Intervention: Laying a Foundation for a Lifetime of Growth 

The Power of Babble

 Before those long awaited first words emerge, children go through stages of babbling development.  Babbling is very important because it develops control over the oral muscles for articulation.

Understanding the five stages of babbling development enables you to track and celebrate your child’s progress in learning to speak.

 The stages of babbling development include: 

1. The Phonation Stage: Children produce vowel sounds (e.g., “ah” and “ee”), cooing, gooing, and cries for different purposes (e.g., hunger, fatigue, attention).

2. The Primitive Articulation Stage: Early consonant sounds start to emerge although they may sound sloppy (e.g., “blah blah”)

 3. The Expansion Stage: Children begin to explore their voice capabilities and the wide variety of sounds that they can produce.  Sounds produced during this stage of development include vowels, squeals, growls, yells, whispers, and raspberries

4. Canonical Syllable Stage: Well formed syllables such as a crisp “ba” begin to appear.  As your child continues to develop in this stage, you may also hear babbling strings of the same sound (e.g., “ba ba ba”) and strings of varied sounds (e.g., “ba da ga”).

 5. The Integrative or Variegated Stage: Mixed babbling with first words begin in this stage.  For example, a child may say “Daddy ba ba ga!”

 Babbling stages often overlap for a period of time.  For example, children may produce early consonants from the primitive articulation stage while also exploring their vocal tracts with squeals and growls in the expansion stage. 

 You can support your child in any stage by mirroring his or her sounds and having a “conversation.” You can also incorporate sounds from the upcoming stage, just to help your child get used to hearing these more complex vocalizations. A playful sharing of sounds is a wonderful way to connect with your little one and have fun together.

Jessica Weed, M.S., CCC-SLP – Early Intervention Speech-language Pathologist

Rainy Day Bathtub Fun!

April showers may bring May flowers, but they also bring more days indoors. Why not help your toddler enjoy these wet days with a little water play in the bathtub? It’s loads of fun and a great way to help develop your child’s coordination.

Bath toys: You don’t have to buy expensive tub toys. Bring in sponges, funnels, turkey basters, spoons, plastic bowls and cups, etc. Encourage your child to pour, stir and squeeze.

Bathtub finger painting: Let your child’s creativity have free run on the bathtub walls using shave cream or children’s foam soap. This is a great way to strengthen arms and hands as well as to work on “pre-writing” skills. Encourage your child to scribble up and down and side to side. Make simple shapes such as circles.

Make your own rain: A plastic spaghetti strainer in the tub is just the right thing for creating your own weather. As water goes through the holes, you can sing any of a number of rain songs.

Bubbles: No bath fun would be complete without mentioning bubbles. For little ones a bubble bath is mesmerizing and an opportunity to reach, grab and splash.

Of course, for safety, it’s important that you always are present with a watchful eye when your toddler is in the tub. Tub time can be a relaxing break for both of you. No running around, just the pleasure of enjoying each other’s company.

Andrea Beebe, OTR/L
Looking Upwards’ Early Intervention Occupational Therapist

Questions to Ask a Potential Daycare Provider

Choosing a daycare for your little one is always a big decision. Both you and your child will feel more at ease, if you find the right match. Here are some questions to consider as you explore your options.

 Questions to Ask a Potential Daycare Provider

 1. What is your daily schedule?

 2. What happens if my child gets sick during the day? Can non-prescription medicine be given by teachers?

 3. Are meals provided? How is food from home handled?

 4. What is your policy on discipline? How are challenging behaviors handled? How am I informed of behavior concerns?

 5. Do you encourage visits from parents during the day?

 Questions to Ask Yourself While Observing a Daycare Setting

 1. How do you feel when you walk into the facility? (calm, overwhelmed, uncomfortable, inspired)

 2. How are the teachers interacting with the children? Do the teachers and children seem engaged?

 3. Is the facility clean, organized and pleasant?

You know your child best. Don’t be afraid to ask too many questions. Ask as many questions as you need to feel comfortable with your decision. Remember that if you pick a daycare facility that makes you feel comfortable; your child will feel comfortable too.

 Celeste Whitehouse, LCSW, M.S.Ed., Looking Upwards’ Child Development Educator

Open a book and a whole new world together!

Children play with books in different ways. They chew them, hide them, look at the pictures, open and close them and pull them off the shelf where you have just placed them.

Reading to children entertains them and provides information about their world. It also helps develop their visual motor skills for scanning from left to right. 

For infants and yearlings, use cloth, vinyl or board books with clear colorful pictures that are familiar to them. Some books may have varying textures to explore or may make sounds. Books that have too many pictures on one page can be overwhelming to a young one. Look for books that have one to a few objects/pictures on it. Infants and yearlings find the rhythm of reading to be soothing and they enjoy the cuddle time, so take advantage of this time to bond with your child.

Toddlers enjoy books which rhyme, repeat and have simple drawings with vivid colors that attract their attention. Repetition of words and sounds leads to memorization, which is the beginning of language development. Don’t worry about reading the book from cover to cover. Talk about the pictures that they notice, point to some of the pictures and use short simple phrases to describe what you see. Encourage your child to talk about what they see, have them point to objects and practice turning the pages.

Encourage book interactions throughout your children’s day by providing easy access to them and set up times during their daily routine in which you can sit and share this wonderful bonding experience with them.

The wonderful thing about books is that there are so many different ways you can get a hold of them. You can buy them from your local book stores like Barnes & Noble, retail stores like Target, Wal-Mart, Marshalls, etc., or if want to save some money, you can pick them up at yard sales, Salvation Army or Savers. You can borrow them at your local library, or you can go to Barnes & Noble and sit down right at the store to read one and then put it back (remember to handle the books carefully or you will end up owning the book).

If you’re looking for suitable reading materials you could ask your local librarian for a listing or go online. Some of my favorite books to share with infants, yearlings and toddlers are:

* Goodnight Moon by Margaret Wise Brown 1947

* Good Night, Gorilla by Peggy Rathmann 1996

* Spot’s Touch and Feel Day by Eric Hill 1997 (Touch/feel book)

* Pat the Bunny by Dorothy Kunhardt 1968 (Touch/feel book)

* Spot’s Toys by Eric Hill 1984 (Vinyl/bath book)

* Grover’s Tubby by Carol Nicklaus 1992 (Vinyl/bath book)

* Peter Rabbit by Beatrix Potter 1989 (Vinyl/bath book)

* Bunny Rattle by Cheryl Harte 1989 (cloth book with rattle in it)

* Baby’s Little Engine that Could by Grosset & Dunlap (Pudgy pillow book)

* Polar Bear, Polar Bear What Do You Hear? by Bill Martin Jr. /Eric Carle (board book)

By Lorie Oesterling, B.S.,   Early Intervention Child Development Educator

Someday your child will stop and think…

Turning Your Child’s Misbehavior Into An Opportunity, Part 2: The Teaching Moment.

How do you help your toddler learn to make positive choices?  The key is to take the time to turn mistakes and misbehavior into teaching moments. Take every opportunity to coach your child in new ways of thinking about his behavior.

Of course you need to help your child manage his behavior and at times give a consequence. This is how your little one learns right from wrong and begins to understand the reality of how things work in the world. Yet, the second step in the process, the teaching moment, is how your child begins to learn the thinking skills that will eventually lead to new behaviors.    

Every time you coach your child to think of new solutions to difficult situations, you are helping your toddler practice a way of thinking that will help her make better choices. Now is the time to plant the seed with your toddler, laying the foundation for the kind of thoughtful, positive choices that you hope your child will make as she grows into her teens and throughout her life.

So how do you coach your child to think about her behavior?  You can do this by following these simple steps:

1. Find a calm moment for both of you soon after your child’s misbehavior. Timing is everything in helping a toddler make a connection between his behavior and learning new ways to handle situations. So even if it’s not convenient, do your best to coach your toddler as soon after the incident as you can.  Of course, for this to be a positive experience you will both have to be calm.                                                                                                                                                                       
2. Help your child connect his feelings to his behavior.  For toddlers, there is often barely a split second between a feeling and acting on it. The first step in developing emotional maturity is to learn that you are having a feeling and to identify that feeling. This is the developmental job of a toddler.  As a parent you can help by assisting your child to identify what he is feeling. You might say, “You must have been mad that Gerry wouldn’t share the toy with you.” 
3. Give your little one a more positive way to handle that feeling and situation. You might say to your child, “Let’s see if Gerry would like to play with this toy and maybe he will let you play with his toy.”  You are teaching your child to negotiate.  

By giving your child alternative ways to get her needs met, you are showing your little one there are other options for how to respond to any situation. This is a very basic skill that she will use throughout her life for problem solving.  

Take every opportunity you can to coach your child and help her practice these initial problem solving skills. You not only will be helping your child learn to handle life’s challenges, you will be developing the ability to talk to each other about things that are important and nurturing a bond you will enjoy for the rest of your life.

Valory McHugh, M.A. – Early Intervention Director

What if your child’s misbehavior was an opportunity?

 Part One:  Laying the groundwork: learning the golden skill . . . Every parent knows how good it feels when they’ve handled their child’s misbehavior constructively. It feels good to know that your child is learning from his or her mistakes and that your child still feels connected to you through the process.

Yet, every parent also knows how lousy it can feel to respond to your child’s misbehavior by flying off the handle. Your child is upset. You are upset. And your child hasn’t really learned from the situation.

So how do you stay calm and objective when your child is at his or her worst? This is the golden skill of all parenting skills. Sometimes staying calm and objective is hard to do, but it is the most important step for effectively supporting your child’s best behavior. If you can reign in your emotions, then everything else will more easily fall into place.

 Here are 3 steps to for developing a calm presence:

1. Before you act, count to three in your head.  Give yourself a moment to gain perspective. Those three seconds will slow you down enough to remember that your child is young and learning. No need to  take his or her behavior personally. 

2. Find your mantra. Take a moment now and think about what that might be for you. You will want to find the statement that you can silently say to yourself when you are upset, that will tip you towards handling the situation in a constructive mode. Nobody can tell you what this statement is. It will have to be something that rings true for you. Here are a few examples, but truly you will need to find what will work for you.

• Let me think.  This really doesn’t have to do with me.  What’s going on for my child?
• I love my child and I want to do my best here.
• Okay. Take a deep breath.  I can do this. Let me listen.

3. Practice. Every time in any aspect of your life that you practice keeping calm under stress, you are developing your patience for the ultimate test of staying calm as a parent.  So throughout your day, slow down take deep breaths, coach yourself to be constructive. You will be strengthening your ability to respond with perspective in everyday life and as a parent. 

Cultivating a calm presence is one of the most rewarding skills you can develop as a parent. As your patience grows, you’ll begin to see new possibilities for how to handle every situation you encounter. As a result, you’ll learn to really use all of those teaching moments that are part of every day with your child.

Stay tuned for part 2:  How to turn your child’s misbehavior into a teaching moment.  In the meantime, we’d love to hear from you. Share your stories with us.  Let us know how these steps work for you.

Valory McHugh, MA – Early Intervention Director